It never snows in Ireland. Well, pretty much never. And even when it does, it’s always the tiniest bit of snow you can imagine – you’re lucky if it covers the windscreen on the car enough for you can get a couple of snowballs from it.
But not this time. This time is different. This is proper snow.
Evidently, we’re getting a blast of Siberian air due to a disruption in the polar vortex – and meteorologists love fancy words. The result is: a blizzard the likes of which hasn’t hit Ireland since 1982. The whole country is covered in snow. The children all got three days – three whole days! – off school. One snow day is amazing, but three!?
The shops sold out of bread and milk, the whole country basically closed for business, and everyone is out building snowmen. It’s amazing! The best snowman we had ever built in all our years in Ireland was about six inches high and we had to use raisins for the eyes. Well, not today. Not today.
Q: What do you call a snowman who works out? A: An Abdominal Snowman.